Perceptions and Perspectives

Have you ever had one of those moments where you have a conversation with someone and then an hour later think “What the hell was I thinking about when I said that?” I had one today.  It was not a pleasant realization on my part, and I feel like I should apologize to the person I was having the conversation with.

See, I invited a friend over for dinner today. The reason was two-fold. It was her birthday and I didn’t relish the idea of spending an evening alone while Matt was attending to work matters. Thankfully, she hadn’t made plans and happily accepted my invite.

I cooked, we ate, I surprised her with a birthday cupcake. It was all good. Then we talked. The conversation ranged from books to current work (she just started the second half of her student teaching). We talked about how different our school experience was compared to what kids go through today – yes, we’ve reached that age. We eventually came around to talking about the upcoming baby shower for another friend. And here is where the disconnect from my brain to my voice box occurred.

There are occasions when I start talking that I ramble, I mean really really ramble. And the things I ramble about are inane and really of no value to the other person that is listening.

No one wants to know that the other day Matt and I went to Ben & Jerry’s after going to a bookstore in Dallas and that he found an awesome peanutbutter cup icecream and  I found an awesome brownie batter one…or that there was really decadent chocolate pudding icecream I was glad I didn’t get a pint of…

I’m always acutely aware of the fact that I ramble, yet it does nothing to hinder it from happening. It started the moment I began to tell her about the progress in the planning and execution of the baby shower. My mind, awhirl with all the details, was not paying attention and things that didn’t matter one iota came pouring out. Things that, in hindsight, made me sound like I was trying to martyr myself as well as make others involved feel badly.  Not. My. Best. Moment.

Naturally all of this occurred to me after she left and I was no longer rambling. I intend to apologize to her directly tomorrow, but I also feel the need to apologize to anyone that has ever listened to me talk…er…ramble.

My apologies if I’ve ever said anything that came across as mean, hurtful, rude or otherwise disrespectful.

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